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10 ?'s for parents of school age children
Your student(s) are capable but have to
be focused. this test is just a reminder to
prepare your children to succeed
Click below for survey
Your student(s) are capable but have to
be focused. this test is just a reminder to
prepare your children to succeed
Click below for survey
http://www.greatschools.net/parenting/talking-to-your-preschooler-top-mistakes.gs?
content=1553&cpn=20090804weeklysend
Talking to your middle-schooler: The top-three mistakes parents make
Avoid these conversational pitfalls to improve communication with your child.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
By Valle Dwight
When you’re ready to sit down and have a chat with your adolescent — whether it's to find out how his
day went or to discuss more serious topics like homework, his behavior, or his friends — there is
definitely a right way and a wrong way to do it. And if you happen to try the latter, you may well run smack-
dab into a dead end.
“Talking to our children in a way that lets them express what is on their mind is extremely important,”
explains Dr. Atilla Ceranoglu, a child and adolescent psychiatrist at Harvard Medical School. “Talking to
children from early on keeps both child and parent attuned to one another. It is solid preparation for the
more stormy, tumultuous days of adolescence.”
Talking points for younger kids
While parent-child relationships can be filled with communication problems, they don't have to be. Find
out how to have more satisfying conversations — and build trust — with your child, no matter the age
level!
An expert in parent-child communication, Ceranoglu offers tips on how to avoid the most common
mistakes parents make when trying to get the conversational ball rolling with their children.
Navigating minefields with your tween
Parent: “We need to talk.”
Child (rolls eyes): “Oh, brother.”
Parent: “Look, I’m just a little worried about some of those kids you’ve been hanging out with. I don’t
think they’re good for you.”
Child: “What’s wrong with them? You’re always telling me to be open to people! You’re such a
hypocrite! I can’t believe you!” (Child stomps off and slams door.)
Ceranoglu has a mentor (a pet lover, apparently) who describes child development with a nice analogy:
Infants and toddlers are like puppies. You can cuddle them all you want, kiss them, and hug them
endlessly — they cannot get enough of you. But teenagers are like cats: They tend to avoid you most of
the time, and once in a blue moon they will seek out your attention. The moment you try to touch them,
however, they run away.
Trying to maintain and build a relationship with your middle-schooler is crucial to surviving the often-
rocky teen years. And just as you know not to run headlong at a skittish cat, there are wrong ways to
approach preteens and young teens:
Waiting for a crisis. When tensions are high, your child is not going to be in a position to open up to you.
Engage early and often, before there is a problem. This way you will develop a rapport with your child
that will be very important when an actual crisis arises. “Remember, it’s impossible to build a bridge in
the middle of a quake, but a bridge built earlier may be flexible and sturdy enough to ward off a quake
when it comes,” says Ceranoglu. “A relationship is just like that. Its foundation and flexible nature are
important ingredients of happiness.”
Taking the too-direct approach. You’re probably not going to get a lot out of your child if you say, “Let’s
sit down and talk.” Instead, do something together your child likes and let the conversation happen.
Spending more time with him now will help build the bridges you’ll need later. “Your consistent
presence in your child’s life will help your child feel comfortable with talking to you if something bothers
him,” says Ceranoglu.
Letting the opportunity pass. Your child may seem to be always pushing you away, but that doesn’t
mean he really wants you to disappear! Be vigilant about observing his mood, and approach him when
you see a chance to talk or do something together.
What works
Even if you manage to avoid these common mistakes, your child may still not be a little chatterbox, but
that’s normal. All you can do is let him know that you are around and ready whenever he is, and be
prepared to drop whatever you’re doing when your child wants to talk. Don’t worry, you won’t have to
keep dropping things for the rest of your life, because once your child is convinced of your genuine
interest, you will have built a relationship that encourages true communication.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Valle Dwight is a reporter, writer, and mother of two school-aged boys. She has written for many
magazines, including FamilyFun, Wondertime, and Working Mother.
content=1553&cpn=20090804weeklysend
Talking to your middle-schooler: The top-three mistakes parents make
Avoid these conversational pitfalls to improve communication with your child.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
By Valle Dwight
When you’re ready to sit down and have a chat with your adolescent — whether it's to find out how his
day went or to discuss more serious topics like homework, his behavior, or his friends — there is
definitely a right way and a wrong way to do it. And if you happen to try the latter, you may well run smack-
dab into a dead end.
“Talking to our children in a way that lets them express what is on their mind is extremely important,”
explains Dr. Atilla Ceranoglu, a child and adolescent psychiatrist at Harvard Medical School. “Talking to
children from early on keeps both child and parent attuned to one another. It is solid preparation for the
more stormy, tumultuous days of adolescence.”
Talking points for younger kids
While parent-child relationships can be filled with communication problems, they don't have to be. Find
out how to have more satisfying conversations — and build trust — with your child, no matter the age
level!
An expert in parent-child communication, Ceranoglu offers tips on how to avoid the most common
mistakes parents make when trying to get the conversational ball rolling with their children.
Navigating minefields with your tween
Parent: “We need to talk.”
Child (rolls eyes): “Oh, brother.”
Parent: “Look, I’m just a little worried about some of those kids you’ve been hanging out with. I don’t
think they’re good for you.”
Child: “What’s wrong with them? You’re always telling me to be open to people! You’re such a
hypocrite! I can’t believe you!” (Child stomps off and slams door.)
Ceranoglu has a mentor (a pet lover, apparently) who describes child development with a nice analogy:
Infants and toddlers are like puppies. You can cuddle them all you want, kiss them, and hug them
endlessly — they cannot get enough of you. But teenagers are like cats: They tend to avoid you most of
the time, and once in a blue moon they will seek out your attention. The moment you try to touch them,
however, they run away.
Trying to maintain and build a relationship with your middle-schooler is crucial to surviving the often-
rocky teen years. And just as you know not to run headlong at a skittish cat, there are wrong ways to
approach preteens and young teens:
Waiting for a crisis. When tensions are high, your child is not going to be in a position to open up to you.
Engage early and often, before there is a problem. This way you will develop a rapport with your child
that will be very important when an actual crisis arises. “Remember, it’s impossible to build a bridge in
the middle of a quake, but a bridge built earlier may be flexible and sturdy enough to ward off a quake
when it comes,” says Ceranoglu. “A relationship is just like that. Its foundation and flexible nature are
important ingredients of happiness.”
Taking the too-direct approach. You’re probably not going to get a lot out of your child if you say, “Let’s
sit down and talk.” Instead, do something together your child likes and let the conversation happen.
Spending more time with him now will help build the bridges you’ll need later. “Your consistent
presence in your child’s life will help your child feel comfortable with talking to you if something bothers
him,” says Ceranoglu.
Letting the opportunity pass. Your child may seem to be always pushing you away, but that doesn’t
mean he really wants you to disappear! Be vigilant about observing his mood, and approach him when
you see a chance to talk or do something together.
What works
Even if you manage to avoid these common mistakes, your child may still not be a little chatterbox, but
that’s normal. All you can do is let him know that you are around and ready whenever he is, and be
prepared to drop whatever you’re doing when your child wants to talk. Don’t worry, you won’t have to
keep dropping things for the rest of your life, because once your child is convinced of your genuine
interest, you will have built a relationship that encourages true communication.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Valle Dwight is a reporter, writer, and mother of two school-aged boys. She has written for many
magazines, including FamilyFun, Wondertime, and Working Mother.
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World's oldest person dies in California at 115
LOS ANGELES (Reuters) – The world's oldest person, a
woman who was born in 1894 and gained a measure of fame
when she voted for Barack Obama for U.S. president, died on
Friday at the age of 115.
Gertrude Baines died peacefully in her sleep sometime
between 6 a.m. and 7 a.m. local time (1300 and 1400 GMT) at
the Western Convalescent Hospital in Los Angeles, where she
had spent the past decade of her life.
"She's a very dignified lady," Emma Camanag, the hospital's
administrator, told Reuters. "It has truly been a blessing and an
honour for us to take care of her over the last 10 years and we
will greatly miss her. It's just like we lost a relative."
Baines had no living relatives, Camanag said, but was popular
at the home and at her church, where she attended services
every Sunday until she became too ill to leave her room.
Camanag said parishioners at the church often visited Baines,
who was born on April 6, 1894 in Shellman, Georgia, and
became the world's oldest person when 115-year-old Maria de
Jesus of Portugal died in January.
Japan's Kama Chien, 114, is now the oldest person in the world.
As a Black woman who grew up in the South during the time of
Jim Crow laws, which required Blacks to use separate and often
inferior public facilities, Baines was celebrated in the media
when she voted last November for Obama, the first African
American elected president of the United States.
She had only voted once previously, for John F. Kennedy, and
told the Los Angeles Times at the time that she supported
Obama "because he's for the coloured." She kept a signed
picture of Obama on her wall, the Times reported.
Baines, who was born during the administration of Grover
Cleveland, married young and later divorced. Her only child, a
daughter, was born in 1909 and died of typhoid at the age of
18.
She worked as a maid in Ohio before moving to Los Angeles
and lived on her own until she was well over 100.
According to the Times, when Baines was asked by reporters
her secret for living a long life, she would reply "Ask God."
(Editing by Philip Barbara)
LOS ANGELES (Reuters) – The world's oldest person, a
woman who was born in 1894 and gained a measure of fame
when she voted for Barack Obama for U.S. president, died on
Friday at the age of 115.
Gertrude Baines died peacefully in her sleep sometime
between 6 a.m. and 7 a.m. local time (1300 and 1400 GMT) at
the Western Convalescent Hospital in Los Angeles, where she
had spent the past decade of her life.
"She's a very dignified lady," Emma Camanag, the hospital's
administrator, told Reuters. "It has truly been a blessing and an
honour for us to take care of her over the last 10 years and we
will greatly miss her. It's just like we lost a relative."
Baines had no living relatives, Camanag said, but was popular
at the home and at her church, where she attended services
every Sunday until she became too ill to leave her room.
Camanag said parishioners at the church often visited Baines,
who was born on April 6, 1894 in Shellman, Georgia, and
became the world's oldest person when 115-year-old Maria de
Jesus of Portugal died in January.
Japan's Kama Chien, 114, is now the oldest person in the world.
As a Black woman who grew up in the South during the time of
Jim Crow laws, which required Blacks to use separate and often
inferior public facilities, Baines was celebrated in the media
when she voted last November for Obama, the first African
American elected president of the United States.
She had only voted once previously, for John F. Kennedy, and
told the Los Angeles Times at the time that she supported
Obama "because he's for the coloured." She kept a signed
picture of Obama on her wall, the Times reported.
Baines, who was born during the administration of Grover
Cleveland, married young and later divorced. Her only child, a
daughter, was born in 1909 and died of typhoid at the age of
18.
She worked as a maid in Ohio before moving to Los Angeles
and lived on her own until she was well over 100.
According to the Times, when Baines was asked by reporters
her secret for living a long life, she would reply "Ask God."
(Editing by Philip Barbara)
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